What are we chasing after? – Dhanalakshmi
Walking along a quiet road in need of à break from over contemplation, I heard a voice calling out from within a gated building. She called me lovingly ‘kannu inga vas saami’. She reminded me of my grandmother, I went to her and enquired about her well being. She said she wants some eggs to eat. Of all the things one could crave for, she craved boiled eggs. I complied ofcourse, went on a egg hunt. One good thing in Erode is everyone is friendly. I bought 4 eggs, handed it to a hotel nearby requesting them to boil it for her. I also ordered Briyani. Figured if grandma craved eggs, she might appreciate chicken Briyani too? And I wasn’t wrong. She was over joyed to see it.
Now, the only problem was how do I hand it to her? Her Gate was locked, no side door, she couldn’t walk, what to do? So, taking the risk of putting my 40 year old knees to test, I jumped over the fence and fed her the delicious dishes.
She could barely stand up. Longing for companionship she sits daily in those same steps facing road side, talking to bypassers hoping someone would pay attention and converse with her Not all of them would have sincere intentions. It worries me to think of her longing for company and innocence. But she insists on being independent. Her house spick and span, devoid of clutter or dust. Clean like a shining granite top, meticulous attention to precise location of things where they are set. Utensils, medicines, beds et all.
She shared her story, her suffering, which are too heavy to share for the fear of sadenning my readers. All i can say is that she prays for peaceful final exit. I cried with her, hugged her for a long while consoling that everything happens for a reason and that I’ll revisit her before I leave. She innocently and lovingly asked if I would just stay with her forever. Honestly, had it not been for my duties as a mother and daughter I might have. 😦 But perhaps in another time and life our paths cross again and I can be of service to her.
All our lives are but a fickle, temporary, fraction of occurence. To let all the mundane ego, money, hurry hurry attitude, power struggle, pissing contest(pardon my strong language) take up our mind space is all but a waste of all our energies.
I wish there was a way I could take care of all these lonely suffering souls. I know I’ll be one among them in a few decades, but if I can get the privilege to alleviate the sufferings of as many sweet, sad souls in the process, I would consider myself blessed and leave the world knowing I helped someone.
She said shell never forget me for the rest of her life. It has been years since I sought blessings from anyone since my grandparents demise, I prostrated and touched her feet today seeking her blessings.
Dhanalakshmi Patti – I hope I get to bid farewell when I leave and I’ll never forget you either.+3